Adoption Denied.
This is harder to do than I thought it would be. I guess it's because I'm having to face my emotions and further deal with what has happened as I'm typing this entry. I'm guessing it's become obvious to you already what I'm referring to, especially if you follow my blog. My last entry was upbeat as I was trying to overcome my adoption fears and convincing myself it was okay to let another doggy into my heart in that space, that void, that Missy left when she left us back in 2009. The blog introduced you to Glory, the little crazy looking dog who'd captured our hearts simply by looking at her picture. Well, try to imagine how captured we were after spending an hour with her in our home this past Tuesday. It took a week, but we finally waited out the other possible adopter to pick another dog. And by then we'd also lined up another dog to visit with, a little black chihuahua/min pin mix, Patsy. We arranged to have both dogs come to our house the same night, but for separate visits. Finally, it was coming together.
I spent the day cleaning the house, rearranging things that are still here and there as we finish up an 8 month long additon. The caseworkers knew our fence was down in one 20 foot stretch as we prepare for a new backyard patio. As 6:00 Tuesday approached I felt like a kid at Christmas. I was nervous and excited to meet Patsy, who was coming first, and my precious Glory.
I'll have to cut down my novella here so it won't become an actual epic because I don't want to lose you here. Let me just say, Patsy was a sweetheart. She was energetic, loved the girls, gave lots of kisses, did her business without being prompted outside, and just fit into our family immediately. Travis said to me, "what if we want both?" My spirit leapt at the thought of getting both! After 25 minutes or so Glory arrived. One caseworker put Patsy in her kennel so we could focus on Glory. Oh, my heart melted. She was absolutely the craziest looking little thing ever! I was instantly her human. We went inside and she became my third arm, just welded herself into my lap. She loves cats and when Catifah made an appearance she finally left my lap to greet her. When Catifah didn't return her excitement, she came back to my lap. That was how it went. The caseworkers were so surprised and happy with how Glory seemed to fit in with us. And of note, Ruthie Belle was a star. She was better than I could have asked her to be. She even got a kiss from Glory!
So they left and I was sure we'd been successful. Travis and I talked and decided we wanted both. So, the next morning after I waited through a sleepless night thinking of my new girls, I emailed the caseworker I'd developed a rapport with. I waited overnight like she asked. I did everything I was supposed to. She told me how great our family was and how we should be proud. She told me she'd contact me soon about their decision. Still, I was certain they would be ours. Man, I was wrong. Never been more wrong in my life.
So after not hearing anythig the entire day and night, this morning I emailed and asked if she had any news for us. Five hours later she wrote me back saying she'd thought long and hard about it and didn't think either dog was right for us. Glory needed a family with much older kids (this after both girls did amazing with her, both getting love and kisses from her) and that Patsy was too adventurous for a home with an inground pool and fence down(this after I reiterated at least 3 times that neither dog would go outside without us EVER and this after we told them our fence would be back up as soon as the concrete was poured). She ended it with suggesting we contact them again after the fence is done and that she hoped I understood she had to do what was best for the dogs.
Okay, so here's where I am devastated. We were willing to pay $300 to get both dogs. These are dogs who came from a KILL shelter into their fostering program. We have a history of succesfully adopting 2 pets and taking in 2 strays. I work at home and will be A MOTHER to these dogs. They will want for nothing. They will be loved, loved, loved more than they've ever known. So they'd rather them stay in foster care because Ruthie Belle MIGHT, again I emphasize MIGHT do SOMETHING? And Patsy MIGHT fall into the pool or slip out the fence? With us RIGHT THERE? I don't get it. Thousands of animals are "humanely euthanized" yearly because people don't want them and we are a loving family willing to PAY to get them, but we're turned down on the basis of WHAT IF?????
You know, I'm at the point where I feel a breeder or dog seller is the only way we'll ever be able to get the dog we want. If we'd found these dogs at the kill shelter before CARE stepped in, would we already have them in our house? My goodness, I don't understand. I just don't.
With my heart shattered in pieces I feel hurt, discriminated against because I have a 4 year old, and because we chose 7 years ago to put a pool in and and we took part of our fence down to improve our home. I don't know if I'll be able to put myself out there again through the adoption process for a dog. Telling my kids we're not getting Glory and Patsy because they think one of them might cause hurt to Glory or that one might fall in the pool was hard. I'm at a loss here. I put myself out there and this is what I got. On the bright side, Jesus is in control. Jesus is in control. He's not surprised by this nor is He in the dark on what the future holds for our family. Amen and amen.
I spent the day cleaning the house, rearranging things that are still here and there as we finish up an 8 month long additon. The caseworkers knew our fence was down in one 20 foot stretch as we prepare for a new backyard patio. As 6:00 Tuesday approached I felt like a kid at Christmas. I was nervous and excited to meet Patsy, who was coming first, and my precious Glory.
I'll have to cut down my novella here so it won't become an actual epic because I don't want to lose you here. Let me just say, Patsy was a sweetheart. She was energetic, loved the girls, gave lots of kisses, did her business without being prompted outside, and just fit into our family immediately. Travis said to me, "what if we want both?" My spirit leapt at the thought of getting both! After 25 minutes or so Glory arrived. One caseworker put Patsy in her kennel so we could focus on Glory. Oh, my heart melted. She was absolutely the craziest looking little thing ever! I was instantly her human. We went inside and she became my third arm, just welded herself into my lap. She loves cats and when Catifah made an appearance she finally left my lap to greet her. When Catifah didn't return her excitement, she came back to my lap. That was how it went. The caseworkers were so surprised and happy with how Glory seemed to fit in with us. And of note, Ruthie Belle was a star. She was better than I could have asked her to be. She even got a kiss from Glory!
So they left and I was sure we'd been successful. Travis and I talked and decided we wanted both. So, the next morning after I waited through a sleepless night thinking of my new girls, I emailed the caseworker I'd developed a rapport with. I waited overnight like she asked. I did everything I was supposed to. She told me how great our family was and how we should be proud. She told me she'd contact me soon about their decision. Still, I was certain they would be ours. Man, I was wrong. Never been more wrong in my life.
So after not hearing anythig the entire day and night, this morning I emailed and asked if she had any news for us. Five hours later she wrote me back saying she'd thought long and hard about it and didn't think either dog was right for us. Glory needed a family with much older kids (this after both girls did amazing with her, both getting love and kisses from her) and that Patsy was too adventurous for a home with an inground pool and fence down(this after I reiterated at least 3 times that neither dog would go outside without us EVER and this after we told them our fence would be back up as soon as the concrete was poured). She ended it with suggesting we contact them again after the fence is done and that she hoped I understood she had to do what was best for the dogs.
Okay, so here's where I am devastated. We were willing to pay $300 to get both dogs. These are dogs who came from a KILL shelter into their fostering program. We have a history of succesfully adopting 2 pets and taking in 2 strays. I work at home and will be A MOTHER to these dogs. They will want for nothing. They will be loved, loved, loved more than they've ever known. So they'd rather them stay in foster care because Ruthie Belle MIGHT, again I emphasize MIGHT do SOMETHING? And Patsy MIGHT fall into the pool or slip out the fence? With us RIGHT THERE? I don't get it. Thousands of animals are "humanely euthanized" yearly because people don't want them and we are a loving family willing to PAY to get them, but we're turned down on the basis of WHAT IF?????
You know, I'm at the point where I feel a breeder or dog seller is the only way we'll ever be able to get the dog we want. If we'd found these dogs at the kill shelter before CARE stepped in, would we already have them in our house? My goodness, I don't understand. I just don't.
With my heart shattered in pieces I feel hurt, discriminated against because I have a 4 year old, and because we chose 7 years ago to put a pool in and and we took part of our fence down to improve our home. I don't know if I'll be able to put myself out there again through the adoption process for a dog. Telling my kids we're not getting Glory and Patsy because they think one of them might cause hurt to Glory or that one might fall in the pool was hard. I'm at a loss here. I put myself out there and this is what I got. On the bright side, Jesus is in control. Jesus is in control. He's not surprised by this nor is He in the dark on what the future holds for our family. Amen and amen.
Comments
Post a Comment